Thursday, September 27, 2007

More Housework For Guys = More Sex?? - By Director Dana Glazer

There's been a lot in the news recently about how there's a correlation about how when men do more of the housework it puts their wives more in the mood. A recent conversation with Sociologist Dr. Michael Kimmel further echoed this. It's certainly a great headline - at least from a guy's perspective (you know what's mostly on our brains:)

However, I felt that a little more research was needed, so I did a little recon at a mommy community know as Kaboose. You can read the whole thread here

The results were consistent with what I've been hearing - that YES! there is a correlation. It seems quite obvious, if one really thinks about it. More housework on the man's part makes for a more cooperative family situation. And yet, statistically speaking, men are still lagging way behind in the house care dept. It goes back to male identity issues, I suppose, something I hope Dr. Kimmel will elucidate further in the film. Hopefully, the message will ring loud enough to make a difference in terms of helping create a more balanced family situation. And if you're reading this and you are interested in sharing your experience on film in this regard, please reach out to me at dana@evolutionofdad.com.

One of the challenges I face as a filmmaker is to make a film about dads that plays to dads and men (although certainly not to the exclusion of women - don't get the wrong idea.) Using sex as an impetus to promoting dads being further involved with the family isn't the big picture but it's definitely a useful catalyst.

3 comments:

Stephen said...

As a housework lover, I'm afraid my experience is that most women find a man doing housework something of a turn-off.

There's no justice in this world, is there?

BH said...

From my experience it's not necessarily extra housework, as it is going "above and beyond".

If you start off a relationship doing equal parts of the housework, helping equally with the kids ( getting up at night with babies, taking the kids to activities, grocery shopping, etc. ) then your wife expects it. Then that becomes the nominal setting. So, just to keep things normal you have to keep doing these things. Then, to go above and beyond becomes difficult, because you already do so much...

It comes down to what the woman expects. If their expectations are low, then they will be happier and give you sex more often, if their expectations are high, well, good luck.

BH

Dana said...

Thanks for your comment, BH.

From the women I've spoken with, it's not about the expectations but more about how overworked they do or don't feel. If a woman is working and taking care of the household without much help, she's likely going to be too exhausted to have her mind on sex. This isn't necessarily about accruing more brownie points for sex but more about creating a cooperative family environment where couples feel more motivated to being intimate because they feel more aligned with each other.

Dana